You're late...

 So this morning around 8:45am, I'm at work and I get a text saying, "Hi Summer, you've missed your appointment this morning for lab work, are you on your way?"

Uh, what?  I quickly look over the appointment paper that they gave me...no appointment.  Then I look over the string of messages they send on this app called Klara...nothing about an appointment. So now armed with this information, I feel confident that they are reaching out to the wrong Summer.

After a few exchanges back and forth...I guess it is me they want.  Although my last labs from Monday came back as negative for progesterone they want to check again to ensure that before I begin taking PIO shots tonight...that my levels are still very low.  (Having progesterone in my system early would mean by body could ovulate on its own, instead of allowing them to hijack it on their timeline, which is what IVF does)

Okay sure I'll let work know that there was an appointment scheduled that they forgot to notify me about and I have to go to Gilbert to complete lab work.  Ugh.  Oh well...it is what it is and luckily my job is very flexible. Whew.

My biggest concern at this point is I've been wearing long sleeve shirts because my left arm still has a major bruise from the phlebotomist royally sucking it up.  

...a few hours later I roll up, quickly get called back and low and behold it's the same phlebotomist!  Oy vey...she asks to see my right arm because it's closest today.  (I think to myself...there's no way she's gonna screw this one up too.  I'm sure it was a one off.  The funny thing is...I've been going here for months...and I don't think I've ever had the same person draw my blood.  Yet I have some how won the bad phlebotomist lottery and lucky me get her twice when my other arm still looks like a junkie 💉😬)

After a less painful draw...I leave bandaged up and scurry back to work.  After about an hour I remember I have this darn bandage on my arm!  So I pulled it off and boom...looks like she screwed up this arm too😞.  

In 100+ degree weather...I will now be wearing long sleeves for the foreseeable future thanks to Ms. Jabby Jabberson the horrible phlebotomist.

For your viewing pleasure...here's my lovely arm pokes after about two hours on both arms.  (Monday and Wednesday)

Monday (8/7) two hours post jab left arm

Wednesday (8/9) two hours post jab right arm

I didn't end up getting a photo of them both a few days after...but trust me, the people who saw them were like holy canoli keep those covered up 🥲.

Wish me luck...PIO shots start tonight.💉😲

He Exaggerated The Length?!

I received a call last night around 5pm asking if I was available to come into the office today for the faux tranfer with the doctor.  (Talk about last minute notice). Luckily, I was able to swing it and scheduled the appointment.

I walked into an empty office (maybe it was lunch time?) and took a seat.  I was feeling a little nervous, which always makes me feel like I need to pee...so as I'm quietly contemplating whether to run really quickly to the bathroom (they didn't tell me to come with a full bladder) a door opens and they call my name.

Welp, I decide I really don't think I have to go (probably nerves) and follow her back. 

She's super sweet and tells me to undress from the waste down.  Luckily, I was prepared and wore a dress👏👍.  So within a minute I'm wrapped in paper with my bare bum on the napkin covered reclining bench thing that are in every OB/GYN office ever.

A moment or so later the doctor knocks and pops his head in asking if I had a full bladder.  After a quick internal status check I let him know that I do. Which was the answer he was looking for!  Apparently they forgot to instruct me to come with one.  (Okay so my bladder wasn't really full or at least didn't feel full...but again I was nervous and I don't think it was empty...so they were getting what they were getting)

Another moment or two passed and the doctor and a team of two other ladies joined me in the room.  We had one nurse with the over the top ultrasound, just like the original transfer and the other was assisting the doctor with the speculum thing.

As they were adjusting everything I made sure to say, I hope that's the longest speculum you have?  Because I was told that my vagina needed the longest one, because my canal was sooo long apparently 🫣.  I wanted to make light of it but also prepare them so I'm not being poked and prodded anymore than necessary...right?

The doctor looked up and said wow, I'm sure that's something nice to hear when you're lying on your back and shook his head looking at the nurses.  (I could tell he wasn't pleased with the comment that had been made).  I just said hey...I've had six children, I can understand things aren't exactly in tip top shape...but I have never heard that I have a long vagina before....ever.🤣 I will own it if I do...just wasn't expecting it😕.  

He was so kind and said that he has done thousands of transfers and he has had some difficult transfers, but none were due to a long vagina. Haha.  He said some ladies develop fibroids which can cause the canal to seem like it's longer...but the canal can only go so far.  He then promised to give me the good, bad, and the ugly truth during the procedure and was ready to begin!

So first of all let me start off by saying, the ultrasound wasn't uncomfortable at all this time (my bladder wasn't about to explode)...she guided him with the ultrasound and within a minute he said okay I'm in, transfer would take place here!

I looked up shocked and said, you're already in?  So what's going on in there?  He said there was absolutely no abnormalities, my vaginal canal was within average length (never thought I'd be relieved to hear I'm average 😉) and he was trying to figure out why the previous doctor had such a difficult time.

Once he was complete he suddenly asked me if my bladder was overly full on the day of transfer. (Um yes!)  It definitely was!  He said that when bladders are overly full, it can push out the catheter, which can make holding it steady difficult, but you either ask for your nurse to hold it or you get creative and hold it in with your knee...it's not using extra length though 🤷‍♀️😜!

I appreciated the update and oddly felt relieved that I don't have a long vagina.  I also am sooo happy because I will make sure that the next time I'm having this procedure performed...I'm underfilling my bladder!!  It was so quick and I didn't experience any discomfort (well any more than you'd expect with a speculum and catheter being put into your hoohaw)!

So first test done!  Next step... Mock Cycle.🥳

Testing, Testing...1...2...3

So last month (June) we left off with a negative pregnancy result and no update on whether we would be proceeding with another round.  It was nice to enjoy 4th of July without the pressure of running back home to receive a shot or being on my period (small wins)!  

My cycle began the day after the 4th, so just a few days shy of where they said it would begin and because I hadn't received an update from the clinic or my sister - I didn't have any pills to take or things to track.  It was a HEAVY few days, but luckily working from home, made it a little more bearable.  

On July10th the clinic scheduled a follow up appointment to go over the results and possible reasons that the transfer did not end with a positive result.  The doctor that has been overseeing my care, was out of town for the actual transfer, but did have the scans, lab results, and notes from the doctor who performed the transfer and felt that there should have been no reason that the embryos didn't implant. 

After looking over the results, he felt that it might be that my cycle isn't like the average woman...so perhaps my uterus was ready prior to the transfer...there is only a 24 hour window for the "magic" to happen.  Since this isn't really anything I've tracked or paid attention to, like um ever...I have no input here. 

My sister mentioned that the transfer was really uncomfortable for me...and that the doctor mentioned that he had a difficult time with the transfer (remember the comment about the "long vagina" LOL).  She asked if this had something to do with it not working.  He said nothing was said in my file or showed in the scans how my anatomy could have made the transfer difficult, so he asked if I would be willing to do a faux transfer, where he would perform the same procedure, but without an embryo inside.  This would allow him to get to know my "anatomy" and prepare for any adjustments that might need to be made when a transfer takes place.

After further discussion, the doctor recommended that instead of a transfer next month, we proceed with an endometrial receptivity analysis (ERA).  Which basically consists of doing the same things as a transfer cycle (taking estrogen and PIO shots five days before "transfer") but instead of a transfer, they take a biopsy of my uterus (similar to a pin prick and send it to an outside lab for review) so they can see if my uterus would be susceptible to a transfer during that same time frame or if they need to move it before or after.  Once they can determine timing, they will proceed with another transfer of two embryos in September.  According to the testing websites, 30% of women have different windows of implantation (WOI) so if I fall in that category, this will help to remove that as an obstacle for implantation.

I've opted to go through with both the faux tranfer this month and the mock cycle and the ERA next month...so wish me luck and let's hope we get some answers with the additional testing and the two month transfer delay is worth the wait 🤞❤️!

Coopergenomics ERA Testing Brochure

ERA Video

Shots in the Wild!

Okay, so today is day 5 of the Progesterone in Oil (PIO) shots and by now we have a rhythm going on.  At home, it's an easy routine.  I have decided laying down flat on my bed, face down, works the best.

As I talked about earlier, the shots gave me a lot of anxiety, so I researched and heard a ton of horror stories, but I also got some good tips too!  My main concern was pain, of course.  Which some experienced at the time of the shot, but others seem to experience after the shot.  As the PIO is being absorbed into the muscle, it can create a knot, which becomes painful.  (After literally hundreds of personal stories, posts, websites, etc...I noticed a few common themes to avoid this.)

First, make sure you're not using the muscle that it's being shot into.  If you have to stand, bend the knee of the side you're going to inject.  I took it a step further and decided to just avoid using either muscle period, so I lie down flat to avoid any flinching ;)

Second, heat the oil up by first putting it in the crease of your arm or arm pit.  It thins the oil out just enough to make it easier to inject.

Okay so...this all plays out great when we are home and I get to lie down on my comfy bed for the shot.  We knew there was going to come an evening when we wouldn't be home...and would have to do the shots somewhere else and that day finally came.

It was father's day and also one of our girl's birthday.  She decided around 7pm that she'd like to celebrate with the family at Pop Stroke, a new mini golf place about, about 20 minutes away.

We have been there before and based on how crowded it is, it can take up to a few hours to complete the two courses they had.  I mentioned that we might have to leave early because I would need to leave around 8:40 to get home in time for my shot, which didn't sit well with the birthday girl, because that meant we wouldn't be able to finish the course and if I left, the party would be over. ( I knew she was referring to me physically taking half the party with me when I left but if course acted completely flattered that I was the glue to this party 🥳.)

So agreeing with her that the party would be lame after I left...I reluctantly agreed to bring my shot paraphernalia with me. Ugh.

Okay so fast forward a few hours, it's a Sunday evening, see the course is popping... literally packed with people.  We have only made it to the 11th hole and it's 8:55.  So Phil and I let the group know we will be back, hand our clubs to the others and head out to the packed parking lot to his car.  (If you've been to this place, you know there is no easy exit from mid course!  We were walking across greens, apologizing to parties as I was praying I wouldn't eat it.)

After we made it out of the course and into the parking lot, to our car.  I suddenly realized that laying face down in the back seat, with Phil bent over on top of me...might not be the best look out in public!  I really hadn't thought it through!

So I share my concerns with Phil and he also agrees this might be more difficult than we thought.  I could lean up against his car outside...but then again he's behind me doing something to my upper behind area...and this is only for people far away!  Let's not count the fact that if anyone was getting into their car or sitting close by, they would see us with the needle, probably looking like some weird junkies!🥴

Okay, okay...think Summer!  Where can we go, we are out of time and I have to get this shot!

I look around and behind me there's a restaurant that's closed for renovations and it has two large container sizes dumpsters outside of it.  The sides of course are open with cars able to view us, but it was darker ish and I didn't see any cameras outside or signs of life inside, so Phil offered to back the car in between these dumpsters to give me more privacy and allow me to lay down in the back seat.

(Ok imagine it being dark...with all parking spaces full...so you can visualize)

Okay so plan is in motion...I'm laying down, trying to relax.  I hear a car start up close by and suddenly I feel something crawling on my feet (because I was wearing sandals and my feet were still touching the ground ew)...Phil is still getting used to giving the shot as much as I am at receiving it and he's hesitating and triple checking he's in the right spot.  So he finally injects me, but I can't stay still any longer, my imagination has gone wild and I could be standing on an ant hill with soon to be thousands of crawly bugs all over me...so I lift up my legs (using the muscles that are supposed to be relaxed ouch).  He finishes the injection (which takes a bit, because it's thick and doesn't come out super quick) and I crawl back out of the car.  

As I stand up fixing my clothes I immediately notice the car, idling with its lights on, perpendicular to us.  (Hand to forehead) I'm sure trying to figure out what in the junky heck we were doing!

Phil's trying to find the needle cover (since I forgot my "sharps" container) and I'm inspecting my legs and feet to ensure there aren't a ton of bugs crawling on me.🥴 I was relieved to know that there didn't seem to be any bugs on me anymore...(the spazzy leg lift did the trick!)

Phil moved the car back away from the dumpsters into our original parking spot and we rejoined the others taking a route...similar to our exit.  We only missed four holes and the police were never called on us...so it was a win in my book!

Although the scenario wasn't ideal...we learned a few things and we laughed a ton.  Happy Father's Day Phil❤️.

Let's do shots...

So today's the day...the day I start the dreaded Progesterone shots.  I'll start today and will need to continue until I'm 12 weeks along.

I'm not gonna lie - the thought of having a 1.5" needle stuck into the upper part of my A$$ doesn't sound exciting.  Part of the deal was that my sister would be the one giving me the injections.  What we didn't anticipate was that she would be traveling a majority of the summer, so last minute we ordered an auto-injector, so I could give myself the shots - but unfortunately it's not in yet!  Everyone in my family has a serious needle phobia, so it took a lot of coaxing, but my husband graciously agreed to try and give me the injection tonight.

These shots are required every single day, at the same time for 12 weeks!  I have to take them at 9PM every night and cannot go over 24 hours.  So if I need to push the time back, it needs to be in 15 minute intervals.  I'm not sure if there is ever an ideal time to get a shot in your behind...

**9PM SHOT TIME**

Okay, so the alarms went off and we started to fumble through this new process.  We grabbed both needles, (the 18G for drawing the progesterone in oil out of the vial and the 22G for injecting it into my booty) the alcohol prep pads, and my tide pod container, which hence forth will be known as my 'sharps' container.

All day, I've replayed how the shot would feel, (ouch) watched the video they sent a few times, and tried to do my best about how quickly it would be over.  I used a compilation of tips...held the progesterone in oil under my arm, to warm it up and decided that my optimal position would be to lie flat on the bed, bunny side up, so there would be NO muscles in use at the time of the injection :)

Phil washed his hands and I prepped the injection needle, even tapped it to get the air bubbles out and pushed until a drop came out the top!  So satisfying...okay back to the task at hand.  I laid down, Phil prepped the location he was going to inject and then proceeded to count down from 3...about three times before he actually jabbed me! hahaha the suspense was killing me! I know he felt it worse than I did!  As soon as he stabbed it in, he started apologizing.  The greatest part was, I actually didn't even feel it go in!  He just chose some random count to use the needle, like a dart to a balloon, and inject me.

Yep - didn't feel a thing!  He was pressing on the skin around it pretty hard with his fingers, so maybe that's the trick?  Not a drop of blood, he was so excited.  It was then that he realized and shared that he was supposed to pull back on the plunger before injecting to make sure he didn't hit any blood vessels, but we both agreed at this point...it was probably fine and went back to high fiving and celebrating the first shot being completed!

A huge sigh of relief, because I really didn't feel a thing.  I mean pressure, but no twinges or stings!  After about a minute, it felt like someone had given me a small charley horse in my bum...but nothing more or worse!  

So...one down, 99(ish) more to go!  Let's hope tomorrow night goes just as smoothly!